mother creative

Showing up; (or) don’t wake me. I’ll wake you.

How does this happen? I shift clothes, toys. Change diapers, clear dishes. Stack drawings, throw away more dried up markers. Absorb more tears and snot. Talk less to adults and spend even less time with my hands in wool.

How does this happen? I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old. They love each other, thank god. The younger pounds on the older when sharp words are spoken and toys are taken. The older cries. Then the younger. Then the absorption of tears and snot come and I’ve yet to knit a full row, go pee, finish my first cup of tea, get properly dressed, or eat a full meal.

For an introverted artist who thrives on unknowing periods of uninterrupted time to create, managing my creating with my home life has just HAD to become one. I take what I can get, even if it’s for 1 minute. I’m learning to let go of expected outcomes of time alone and just roll with it. The beauty of creating with littles around is they are so curious and new skills and interests are built. Even in the moments I do have alone now when they are in school or when they are sleeping and I’ve finished a project, I’m so excited to share it with them. They’ve seen me puzzle over it, undo stitches, start again, all while using scraps that fall to the floor for their “soups” and “bracelets”. I may long always to have more time alone to create but the fact that they are so interested in what I’m doing and what to try too is also so precious.

Anyway, I’ve been out of my writing practice for far too long because I’ve been very busy. But this here is the beginning of a new series of writings I’ll be sharing at least weekly. But also, look what I made.

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